Many years ago, I was having lunch at a famous Chinese restaurant in San Francisco and experienced flowering tea for the first time in my life. If you aren’t familiar with flowering tea, it is exactly what its name infers. It is normally a mild tea that contains an actual closed flower in it that, when steeped, opens and blooms. It makes for a truly gorgeous cup of tea.
With the recent deaths of both my mom and dad, it has been a challenge for me to not close myself off to things around me. When we endure trouble and difficult times, it is so easy to curl up and just want the world to stop for a while. Believe me, I get it! I realized yesterday morning that it has often felt like I am waking up from a very long dream but paralyzed in some way. Today, however, I can’t help but think about how God has provided so many things in my life to help keep me putting one foot in front of the other, even if it’s only an inch at a time some days. Throughout all the turmoil, He has continually been walking me through every single moment of every single day. So what does this have to do with an interesting cup of tea?
Flowering tea cannot be done with cold or even cool water because the flowers just won’t bloom. It takes extremely hot water to cause them to open up and reveal their colors. I can’t help but think of how this is also true of our lives and the trials through which we walk. Sometimes it takes enduring extremely difficult and even painful times for our hearts to open and begin to bloom again. Sometimes it is through the heat that we are forced outside the shadows and into the light. If asked, most of us would say we much prefer comfort to pain, yet pain is a result of growth. There is a pendulum that swings between the growth from pain and the healing of comfort, and both are needed in their respective times. Too much pain in life and we will collapse; too much comfort and we will atrophy. If we give up in the middle of the journey on which we walk, we may never see what could have been.
Merriam-Webster defines endurance as “the ability to withstand hardship or adversity, especially: the ability to sustain a prolonged, stressful effort or activity.” We’ve all had at least some measure of experience with endurance. Enduring, by nature, will wear you out, but there is something beautiful that happens when we push through life’s pains and find the stamina to keep going. When we endure, we are gifted with golden moments in time that we would never experience if we just gave up. Sometimes these moments come at the end of a journey, but often they come all along the way. God not only has a way of strengthening us through ways we could never imagine, but He also provides respites for our weary souls as we travel onward.
Recently, I shared with someone that sometimes we can’t see the trees for the forest (instead of the forest for the trees). It is easy, as a person of faith in times of distress, to say God is in control and we know He is working everything out for our good. Although true, that perspective is like a view of the forest. It is great to step back and remember that God is always making a way through our situations and emotional turmoil, but it is just as important to sometimes step forward and take notice of all the little trees that make up that forest. Those trees might be the people in our lives, organizations to which we belong, the beauty of nature, a text from a family-member or a late-night conversation with a friend. For me, there has been a grove of trees in my life over recent months within the church I attend, and I would venture to say that most of the people involved haven’t a clue of their impact on my journey, or how God has used them as a salve to some of the broken places in my heart. I look at these individual trees with wonder in my heart tonight. I am in awe of how my Heavenly Father continually weaves together a net of His grace to hold me up through individual people and experiences. Yes, the forest of His overwhelming love and grace in taking care of us is a beautiful scene to behold, but each of the trees that make up that forest are unique and special when you look a little more closely. It is in the balance of these two perspectives that I fall to my knees in gratitude to the One who knows the end from the beginning and how to handle every turn of the path along the way.
God is good even when life isn’t. Joy and happiness may be related but they are not the same. We read in James 1:1, “Count it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.” You might be wondering how that is even possible! This isn’t about being happy in our trials, but rather finding joy in the fact that our trials are evidence of God working in our lives. Just like an athlete who endures the stress and pain of training so he or she can run a race with maximum strength and efficiency, God is allowing our trials to strengthen us to run the race that is set before us (Hebrews 1:1-2). It is this perspective that allows joy to flow through us even when we are struggling. We read a few phrases later in James 1:5, “But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” James is referring to what he said in verse one about understanding our trials from a different perspective, that we should (and can) find joy in the assurance God is working in our lives and strengthening us. If we can’t seem to be able to do that, then we simply need to ask God for wisdom necessary for that higher perspective, and He will give it to us.
The best thing any of us can do is to recognize God for who He is and to understand who we are in light of that truth. He is worthy not only of our praise and worship, but also of our trust and faith in the way in which He is directing our paths or the paths of those we love. Storms may rise but we so often need to simply be still and let God move. We need to have a conversation with ourselves that reminds us of the truth that God is in control and there is no need for worry. A dear friend recently shared with me the words to an old hymn, and although the poetry of the original lyrics is so beautiful, it is the message the writer is giving to her own soul in times of distress that moves me to tears and inspires my heart. I share them with you in the phrasing I speak them to myself today. Be still, my soul; the Lord is on your side. Patiently bear the cross of grief or pain. Leave it to God to put things in order and provide, because in every change, He will remain faithful. Be still, my soul: your best, your heavenly Friend will lead you through the difficult and painful paths to a joyful end. Be still, my soul for God has taken it upon Himself to guide the future as He has the past. Don’t let anything shake your hope and confidence. One day you will see and understand the mysteries you have now. Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know His voice who ruled them while He lived here on earth. Oh soul, be still when dearest friends depart and everything is darker in the valley of your tears. Be still and then you will better know His love, His heart who comes to soothe your sorrow and your fears. Be still, my soul and remember from His own fullness, your Jesus can replace everything He takes away. The hour is growing near when we will all be forever with the Lord. When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone, sorrow will be forgotten and love’s purest joys will be restored. When change and tears are past, we will all finally meet and be safe and blessed.”
Whether we are walking through times of distress, grief or pain, there is beauty in what God is doing in us and through us. There is a purpose in the fires through which we walk, and God is always working through the searing pain that flows around us. Every trial we endure is as that glass of flowering tea, and the extreme heat we may sometimes feel will destroy us is the very thing necessary to set us free to bloom. Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning. I pray for stillness for your soul, that it is reminded we can rest in the arms of our Father and trust Him. We can feel a blessed security not only in His promises, but in the truth that neither He nor his promises will ever change because He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. It is overwhelming when our souls are stilled and our vision is cleared. I am so grateful for that clarity, and I cannot wait to see the bloom of the flower this season of life brings forth.
Blessings!
We’ve all heard, seen, or even experienced being in the eye of a violent storm. We’ve watched hurricane coverage on the news and marveled at those broadcasts that occur while the “eye” is passing over. Things change drastically in the eye of the storm. Raging winds calm down, torrential rains stop, and the dark clouds break to reveal the warm light of the sun. It really is a beautiful pause, but the reality is that the storm is far from over.
I said earlier the eye of the storm is a “beautiful pause,” because that’s all it is – a pause. This temporary period of peace and calm is simply a chance to take a breath, gather yourself back together and think clearly for a little while. It’s a moment in time in which we are reminded that there IS life out there beyond the storm. It reminds us the sun is still shining and takes us to a place of hope that can strengthen our resolve in the face of knowing there is nothing we can do but endure the impending return of the storm. This eye is where I find myself right now. Standing in a place of peace, being reminded of how beautiful life can be, and creating an even deeper appreciation for every other time of calm when the storms weren’t raging. In this place of peace, it is easy to see clearly the path behind and to gain perspective on the path ahead, even though I cannot direct it.
Sometimes we need the perspective that only the storm can bring. We can become so complacent in our “ruts” in life, often assuming we will always be able to maintain the status quo. We float through our days, almost mindlessly at times, and when the storms roll in, we are suddenly more alert. We may be scared or disrupted by what is happening, but we are no longer able to be oblivious to what is going on around us. We may endure the shakeup in our routines that come when the storm hits. We may have seen it coming and tried to make preparations for riding it out, or it may have hit us without warning. We struggle and react from a survival instinct, and it isn’t easy, but then the eye of the storm moves overhead. It is then that we have that pocket of peace where we can take a deep breath and be reminded of what it feels like when there are no storms on the horizon. We can be refreshed and even strengthened in these beautiful moments of perspective.
If you don’t know which way to turn, don’t turn. Be steady and listen for God’s direction, but then be willing to do what He leads you to do, even when you know He is leading you into an area you’d rather not go. But if you are genuinely seeking God’s will for your life, don’t take any path off the table. We cannot seek His will or clarity in direction but then tell Him which paths we will not take. And if He is answering your prayer for clarity but you keep creating your own noise that is making it impossible to hear, then He may allow storms in to shake your priorities back into focus. He will bring you through the first half of the storm into the eye where everything falls into place, and you gain the perspective you need in order to not only survive the storm, but to come out with gratitude for the clarity. My prayer for you is the same as it is for me, that we breathe and press on with courage and total trust that all is already well, even though we can’t see it yet. No matter what the landscape looks like when the storm is over, I pray we can find joy and peace in having made it through, and have a renewed sense of strength and clarity in learning what is truly important and what is not.
Have you ever walked through tough times in your life and come out on the other side, only to be plunged back into difficulties? It’s one of the most discouraging things in life to think you have finally hit some smooth sailing and then your boat overturns again. In my life, these times have rattled and shaken me to the core. I have felt defeated, like the sun was never going to shine again, and have often felt like maybe God is mad at me for some reason to have allowed more trouble in my life. Of course, there are all the cute quotes out there that remind us God is always good and is always working for our good. Heck, I even believe that, but man, sometimes I don’t feel it. I sit and wonder what God is up to and why there are times it feels like He yanks me out of a pleasant place only to drop me into a difficult, depressing or downright terrible place. If I’m being totally honest, it makes me question His goodness and wonder why He doesn’t just put me (or others) in that pleasant place and let us stay there. Sometimes it is life circumstances that just hit us, but sometimes God actually calls us out of the good places for a reason.
There was certainly a bigger purpose for bringing Lazarus back than just relieving the grief of his family. God used that event to show who He is and that He IS who He says He is. He used it to show His power, but also his mercy and love. Look, there was no denying the miraculous nature of what happened. The Bible tells us that Lazarus was in the grave for four days already and that he stunk! No one could deny he was dead – I mean “dead” dead! There was no way to say what Jesus did was a parlor trick or anything else. It was most definitely effective! Not only that, but the disciples needed their faith strengthened, and Jesus knew that bringing Lazarus back would accomplish that. But again, what about Lazarus? What good did it do HIM to be brought back? He lost all of the perfection of Heaven, AND he would have to go through an earthly death TWICE! Is it just me, or does that seem mean to anyone else? I’ve felt bad for him on that piece, because it really feels like he got the short end of that stick. I think that’s why we don’t often talk about this piece of the story. We don’t want to think that God would purposely bring us back from something amazing – or even perfect – just to drop us back into something where we are going to have to struggle. We can say all day long that we’d be ok with it since it for His glory, but I really don’t think that’s how our hearts react when it happens.
When things are going well for me, I need to stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. I’m sure Lazarus wasn’t worrying about things on earth after he died. He was simply enjoying being in Heaven. I need to do the same thing in life’s pleasant places. I need to just sit back and marvel at how true God’s word is, and that He has taken care of me just as He promised He would. I need to just relax in that place and not worry about what else might or might not happen. I’ll be honest, that is NOT a natural or easy thing for me to do, but it would be so much better for me. When we worry about what might be coming next, we drain all the joy and peace out of the pleasant places in life. When we do that, we wring the joy and confidence in God out of our lives as well. Then we wonder why we are so stressed or why God feels so far away.
So the next time I hear, “Deanna, come forth,” I’m going to take a quick look around before I leave the amazing place in which I’m standing, and consider all He did to deliver me from trials in the past. By doing that, I can walk back into this flawed world with complete confidence and security in the truth of His word. Only then can I live a liberated life, free of worry and fear in my circumstances, because I have seen His glory and His fulfilled promises first hand. THAT knowledge and experience in the pleasant places is what will change the way I live in every place else.
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about the spiritual battles we face in this life. At times, I really struggle to hang onto my faith when the enemy continually tries to get me to doubt what I know to be true about God and His nature toward us as His children. I mean, I know the right things to say and even think, but it is so easy to get caught up in fear, frustration, sadness and a host of other emotions when we are faced with life’s difficulties. Even the apostle Paul shared his struggle with the battle between our human nature and our spiritual one. He said, “What I want to do, I don’t do, but what I hate, that’s what I do. I don’t do the good I want to do, but I do the bad that I don’t want to do, and then keep on doing it.” Man, he sounds a a lot like me. Paul explains that it is his sin nature that causes such a problem because once we are saved, we know what we should do, but we often struggle to follow through with it. Not only that, we struggle what to think, which then causes confusion in our emotions as well. It’s easy to see why we are so often tangled up within ourselves, walking the line between fear and faith or doubt and trust.
Our enemy KNOWS his eventual fate. The judgement and sentence has been declared and sealed! Revelation chapter 20 describes exactly what awaits him. He knows how it all ends, and yet he still has his last 24 hours of freedom before it all comes to pass. He cannot run or hide from his fate, so he is determined to wreak as much havoc as he possibly can until that time. He is continually trying to keep the unsaved from believing in Christ, but his greater successes come in trying to keep saved children of God from living the abundant life God has promised to us. I will always believe that Satan’s greatest accomplishments come within churches full of believers. God has promised to reveal himself to ALL men (Titus 2:11), so Satan can’t keep someone from the reach of God. He has a much better chance at getting Christians to fall away from the truth than preventing someone from hearing, seeing, or knowing it. Satan loves to blind people. He loves to turn believers into unbelievers. 2 Corinthians tells us that he blinds the minds of the unbelievers to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel. I think we’ve done a huge disservice in taking this as referring to only those who have not accepted Christ as their Savior. Yes, Satan can blind the unsaved so that it is harder for their hearts and minds to be opened, but he does NOT have the power to keep God from reaching them. GOD IS ALL POWERFUL! So then we have to look at that verse a little differently.
My relationship with God has shifted from a good relationship to an intimately personal one. As a result, I have learned to relax IN HIM instead of relaxing because of Him. There is a huge difference between knowing all the right verses and knowing Him. There is a difference between seeing Him as a loving entity who can help you and recognizing Him as a Dad – as your “Abba Father.”
I’ll leave you with this last thought: We are also living in our own 24 to life period. We all have a finite number of years on this earth. Once those years are gone, we lose our opportunity to reflect the love and nature of our Father in Heaven to those here on this earth. We lose the chance to make things right with the people in our lives. We lose the chance to leave a positive mark on our own little corner of the world. I don’t know about you, but I want the people who know me to look at me and say, “She is her Father’s daughter.” I want people to see His nature in me because I love and forgive. I want them to see someone who struggles with worry and fear but who also steps back and remembers the truth so that I have peace and contentment. I am living 24 to life. Though that “life” means eternity of peace and joy in Heaven, I want my “24” down here on Earth to not only be abundant for me in all ways, but to be an abundant encouragement and strength to everyone around me. I pray that for myself, and I pray that for all of you too.
Most of you have at least heard of the story in Exodus 14 of the people of Israel being trapped in front of the Red Sea with no way out. There was impassible terrain on both sides, they were being pursued from behind by Pharaoh’s army, and there was a sea in front of them. Death and destruction seemed certain, but God had actually 
I mentioned there were TWO times where God parted literal waters to make a way for His people. The first was the Red Sea, but the other was Jordan River. The people of Israel were still journeying along the path God was directing them, carrying the Ark of the Covenant (Joshua chpt 3). They arrived at the edge of the Jordan River, and there was no way for them to cross. This was the time of year the river ran so high and swiftly that it would overrun its banks. It was a rushing, flooding river! God instructed Joshua that when the people come to the brink of the flowing waters of the Jordan, the priests who were carrying the Ark were to “stand still IN the Jordan.” Joshua passed the message along, and they did as they were told. As a result, the waters parted, and the people passed across on DRY GROUND! Sound familiar? Wait until God tells you to do otherwise and He will make the way clear. There is a glaring similarity in these two events: God’s direction was to “stand still” and He would provide a way. On the other hand, there is also a glaring difference. At the Red Sea, the people were to stand still and watch God open the path ahead. The sea parted before anyone stepped into it. At the Jordan River, the men were told to stand still IN the Jordan first and then God would open the path. The waters didn’t part until AFTER they stepped in.
Standing still isn’t easy. Waiting for God to open doors and paths in our lives isn’t easy, but knowing where we are supposed to stand still is an even tougher dilemma for us. Are we (am I) standing at the edge of the sea or the raging river? How do I know if I am waiting on God to move, or if God is waiting on me to step into the water first? Are we at a standoff of faith? Am I misinterpreting my role in this journey? Questions flood our minds when we are struggling. We question why God isn’t opening the path before us or why He doesn’t seem to be moving. We strain our eyes for signs of where we are supposed to go or what we are supposed to do. Do we wait or do we leap? My friends, God is not the author of confusion! (1 Cor 14:33) He is continually leading us in all different ways – some are obvious and some are subtle, but all are powerful if we are willing to follow. God may drop a sign as obvious as a pillar of fire or cloud in front of you and say “follow that,” or you may have to rely simply on His words. You may be led to a dead end and told to stand still on the banks of the ocean and wait, or you may be told to step INTO the waters first and wait for them to part. I think most of us probably prefer waiting for the path to open before we embark upon it. We like to see it before we walk it. There are some, however, who actually prefer jumping into the river first and then seeing the path emerge.
The “Jordan River” brings a total different type of stress. I’ve been there too. There isn’t the same urgency of survival that happens at the “Red Sea.” You aren’t trapped and no one is actively pursuing you to destroy you. You are simply lacking direction. It isn’t hard for us to stand still in these times because the status quo can be an addictive drug. When there isn’t an urgent threat, it’s easy to just stick with what you know, but we find ourselves in situations where we are driven to fear, depression, and anxiety. We know God has the ability to deliver us, but we can see different options or paths for that to happen. As a result, we become paralyzed because we don’t want to give up what we have if God hasn’t shown us the path yet. We don’t make the leap because we fear we will be worse off than we are now. “Better the devil you know than the devil you don’t,” right? So we give up joy, peace and contentment for the sake of stability and safety. The stress of the Jordan doesn’t come from having to calm yourself to be still in the face of a charging enemy; it comes from having to get the courage to let go of safety and stability FIRST and then wait for God to reveal the path. Let me add one other thought here. God told them to step into the raging flood waters and THEN to stand still. He didn’t tell them to step in and keep walking. Our tendency at the Jordan is to say, “I know God wants me to step into the river and He will show me the way.” What we forget is the very next step after leaving the safety of dry land, is to stand still in the unknown. The fear and anxiety that comes with the Jordan comes from letting go of a sure thing and seemingly risking everything. It comes in doing making the leap and then having to calm yourself as the flood waters rush around you. It comes in trying to stand while the force of your circumstances are trying to pull you under. Instead of asking God “Why did you bring me here to be destroyed,” we ask ourselves, “What was I thinking?!” We start questioning if we did the right thing, because destruction seems certain as a result of our decision. We experience the elation of courage, only to be hit with the panic of survival. We step in, but when the way isn’t immediately made clear, we step back out and wonder why we still don’t see a path. That isn’t God’s fault; it’s ours.
No matter where you find yourself today, standing at the Red Sea or the Jordan, don’t panic. God is with you, leading you forward. He isn’t holding His will behind His back and making you play a game to try and figure it out. If you truly want direction, and are in fellowship with your Father, then He will reveal it to you. You may still be asking, “But how do I know?” Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path.” Notice the little word in the middle – “all. That little word leaves no room for creating your own directions or forging your own path. Are you the master of your destiny? Yes, absolutely. You have complete freedom of choice to live your life how you choose. You can go it alone, bumping into walls, frustrated and always seeking direction, or you can acknowledge God in ALL your ways and He will provide the direction for which you are seeking. If you want to know which way to go, then get humble, surrender your will to His in every area, and then listen to that still, small voice within. He has promised He will lead us; we simply need to be willing to stand still first, and then follow where He leads.
The Cadence of My Soul 