It’s Still Christmas

I can’t believe it’s Christmas Eve, and we still don’t have a reprieve on the challenging situations 2020 has brought to us.  I’ve been silent this year because every time I sat down to write, my thoughts would just get jumbled as they tried to make their way through all the emotions that have been so overwhelming. Hopefully, the fog is beginning to clear.

Christmas time should be a time when we can all come together with family and friends to celebrate the fact that God, Himself, came to this earth to be born to die for me and you.  What a great mystery of love and redemption!  But this year is different in our world.  This year, our world looks different.  We have lost so many loved ones and seen so many lives ruined by illness, politics, finances, relationships and a host of other factors.  It seems like everywhere we turn, there is nothing but tragedy and people are weary.  I am weary.  Traditions this year have been shattered for months.  Holidays and special family times have not only shifted or been eliminated, but anxiety and anger have permeated our lives as a result.  For me, there have been times when I have felt like I have lost my voice and just want to give up.  I know many of you have felt the same. 

So here we are at Christmastime, fighting to keep our heads up when our spirits are exhausted.  How do we find the strength to celebrate when our hearts are broken?  How do we find joy when there is grief all around for the loss of what our lives used to be?  We need to step back and look at all the good that has come in this year. 

We have a tendency to keep our eyes staring at all the things that go wrong in life.  It’s hard NOT to do that because it is around us every day.  Sure, 2020 has seemed to have much more of it than we are used to, but only because we live in a nation that is used to being prosperous and healthy.  I sponsor four children in poverty-stricken nations and although there have been some minor changes with Covid19, life is still mostly the same as it was before this pandemic began.  There are people in countries all over this world who deal with poverty, disease, and grief as part of their daily lives.  It has always been somewhat foreign to me, until this year.  Quite frankly, the tragedies of 2020 have opened my eyes to more than I could have imagined.  We truly seem to spend more time focusing on what is going wrong in our lives instead of what has gone right.  It is just easier to frown than smile.  It is easier to give up than fight.  It’s just so easy to fall into an all or nothing mindset, but then we lose all sense of balance.

There is so much good in this world!  There are so many gifts in our lives that we take for granted.  Although we have been prevented from spending time with our family, friends, or loved ones, we have other means through which we can connect. Technology can be such a negative force in our lives, but in this case, I am so grateful to be able to call, face-time, zoom, facebook, Instagram, or whatever other channel exists to not only talk with those I love, but to see them.  If you got out of bed this morning, it is a gift.  If you took a breath, it is a gift!  If you walked outside to get your mail, it’s a gift.  This video started circulating a few years back and it really emphasizes what I’m saying. If we viewed the things in our lives as the gifts they are, our attitude would be so different. 

Life may be interrupted this year, but there is still so much to celebrate. In the midst of these troubling times, our traditions may be disjointed.  Maybe you lost a loved one this year and are dealing with a grief you can’t even wrap your head around.  Maybe, you haven’t been able to hold your grandkids.  Maybe you have an elderly parent living in a home that has locked it’s doors and not let you inside to care for them. Maybe it’s the birthday parades, the window visits, the isolation, or whatever else is dragging you down.  Whatever is interrupting your “normal” life, take heart; You are not alone, no matter how it feels in any given moment. 

Christmas is STILL here!  The reason we celebrate has not changed!  The God who spoke the world into order, humbled Himself to become a man so that He could die for you and me!  He gave us the greatest gift, not only in His sacrifice, but in His example of love and forgiveness.  He made a way for us to be with Him, and He is still making a way every day for us to see Him if we just open our eyes and look past our circumstances.  We celebrate because He brought us not only life, but hope, joy and LOVE.  The spirit of Christmas isn’t found in a store somewhere.  Heck, even the Grinch learned that truth!  Christmas truly is in our hearts and we celebrate by sharing our hearts with each other.  It doesn’t take money to show kindness, compassion, forgiveness and love.  It doesn’t take even being in the same location to show those things.  We are free from circumstances when we realize what makes us truly connected has nothing to do with our geographical location, but in the nearness of our hearts and spirits.

So as we head into this most beautiful time, let us focus on what we have and not what we’ve lost.  Let us focus on what truly matters in life.  Let us remember that the true traits of Christmas aren’t reserved for those we love, but for all mankind, just as that original gift of Jesus’ birth so long ago was for the world, so are the gifts of everything He represents.  Step back and breathe some deep breaths.  Even if you are completely by yourself in this moment, you are still not alone.  Even if you are surrounded by loved ones but wrapped within your own private griefs, you are not alone.  You are known by God Himself and held within the arms of the one who loved you so much that He stretched out those arms on a cross to show you just how wide His love is.

There is always good.  If you can’t find it this season or this year, then BE it. 

Blessings to you all, and Merry Christmas!

Changed

It is impossible to be looking into a new year without looking back into the past one.  This time of year often stirs us to take a look at our lives and ourselves, which in turn prompts us to make attempts at changing.  Our attempts may be well-intended, but studies show that about 80% of all resolutions are broken by mid-February.  That seems surprising, but it really isn’t when you think about it.  I mean, after all, where do these resolutions come from?  They are like short-term relationships that are doomed to fail from the beginning.  But why?  I believe it’s because of the manner in which we enter into them.  Like most things in our society, we start off great but lose the ability to follow through when things get tough.  It’s easier to just throw in the towel and revert back to the familiar because it’s what we’ve always known.  As they say, “Better the devil you know that the devil you don’t.”

shutterstock_446732614True changes don’t come easy.  They are uncomfortable, even painful at times.  They come at inopportune moments or cause us to lose things we really, really don’t want to let go of on our own.  Those of you who have read my posts this year will understand when I say 2019 was a challenging year.  I’ve caught myself saying a lot lately that I hate 2019 and can’t wait for 2020.  The truth is, 2020 isn’t going to change anything.  It isn’t a new year that changes us; it is we who change the new year.   As the new year got closer, I noticed my perspective on last year starting to shift.  I actually started to see things differently, and my heart softened to the experiences in 2019 that left me curled up in a ball, crying myself to sleep so many nights, thinking I just can’t get through another day.  Every day brought tears and pain, but as I looked backwards,  I began to see through those times to the incredible experiences and growth that has happened as a result of them.  It really has been amazing.   I am not the person I was a year ago, and for that I am grateful.

When looking back at the past year, most people talk about life events, changes, gains and losses, and other things that have taken place.  It is easier for us to talk about what has happened to (or around) us than to talk about what has gone on within us.  Looking inward requires us to strip down and be honest with ourselves about what we see.  For me, this past year has brought so many of those moments that I’ve lost count!  Maybe it’s because life in general was so full of loss and griefs that I didn’t have the energy to keep pressing on in the same way I had for most of my life.  Was it a brutal year?  Absolutely!  I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but it wasn’t without purpose.  Through the difficulties, I’ve learned to let go a little more.  I still struggle with it, but I’m finding peace in the liberation when I do.

If I were to articulate the long list of events and how they’ve changed me, I’d be writing all night.  However, if you were to ask me to name the single most life-altering thing I’ve experienced in 2019, well, that answer is easy.  It wasn’t leaving the church I belonged to for over 20 years, the loss of my husband’s parents, or even the fact my dad had to move into a memory care facility due to dementia.  Those things certainly altered my life in huge ways, but the biggest reverberation in my life came from the teaching and study I have been a part of in the home church to which I belong. shutterstock_1234835116 It happened totally organically a year ago, and I could not have dreamed how amazing it would become.  The teaching our pastor has continually shared with us has been the most liberating of my life.  Some of that impact comes from the fact he is real and vulnerable with us, while some of the impact is the way we are challenged through our discussions to live life differently.  It is certainly not a traditional format, but I’ve been changed more in the past year than I can ever remember being changed in the past.  It’s just different, and as a result, so am I.  In the middle of the worst year of my life, God brought me through it by first using a man who was willing to answer His call, then surrounding me with a group of believers who have all been called to come together to be real in this journey of learning and following Christ’s example of who we were created to be.  It is this realness in every aspect of life, the sharing of our struggles and truly bearing each other’s burdens that has only deepened our desire to learn more, and to be changed more.  It is this unique experience that has changed my life forever.  What I’ve learned has been gut-wrenching at times, but it is amazing what God will show you about yourself if you will just get your eyes off of everyone else.  I’ve been liberated from old perspectives, of myself and others. I’ve even been liberated from some specific chains that have held me captive my entire life.

2020 begins a brand new year, and i’s a great time to tackle something new or set goals for what we want to accomplish.  It’s a good time to reflect on the past year, or longer, and appreciate the difficulties we have come through or even the ones we are still trudging through.  But it is also a good time to look deep within and start focusing on the things that bring lasting changes.  I don’t want to make a resolution, or several of them.  I don’t want another task in my life to complete; I have enough of those.  I want to continue to truly change.  It isn’t easy to do, but there is some truth to the phrase, “no pain, no gain.”  If any of us want to learn how to live with peace, joy and strength even in our toughest times, we must be willing to turn our eyes honestly inward through the truth of God’s word and see what we really need to change.  It may surprise you what you find.  A year ago, I thought I knew who I was, but I have learned I wasn’t nearly the person I had hoped.

shutterstock_257497339Life can, and will, beat you up.  I don’t want to spend 2020 with the pessimistic mindset that crept in over recent years, but rather with the peace that comes from knowing God will always be working in the lives of His children.  I don’t want my inner dialogue to keep telling me things won’t work out, or that things aren’t “fair.”  I don’t want my “justice gene” to cause me to look down on others or take things personally.  I want to continue to be open to God revealing those things in me that I have chosen to be blind to in the past.   In doing so last year, I’ve experienced a liberation I did not see coming, and it changed my life.

As I mentioned earlier, it isn’t a new year that changes us; it’s we who change the new year.  We can choose to keep doing the same things we’ve always done.  We can choose to hide behind our despair or lash out in anger.  We can choose to focus on the splinter in someone else’s eye instead of the log in our own (Matthew 7:3).  The reality is that we can just keep on trucking and wonder why the abundant life keeps eluding us, or we can choose to be changed by the One who created us.

It is impossible for us to know what the new year will bring, but if we open ourselves up to what can change us far longer than any resolution, we can weather any storm because we know the master of the wind.  It’s up to us…choose wisely.

Happy New Year and blessings to you and yours.

The Little Blue Sock

shutterstock_65088625.jpgOver 70 years ago, my mom was just a sweet, little 5-yr old girl living in a small town in California.  She’d been hearing her friends talk about Santa Clause in December, and how if you hang a stocking on your fireplace, Santa Clause would fill it with candy and toys if you had been good.  My grandparents weren’t raised with the standard traditions of Christmas being all that important, but my mom certainly didn’t know it.  Mom didn’t have a stocking, nor had she ever heard of Santa Clause.  They didn’t even have a fireplace in their small house, but on that Christmas Eve she took one of her light blue socks and taped it to her door in hopes that Santa would show up. On Christmas morning, she got up, excited to see what she had received.  She ran to where the sock was hanging and it was still there…untouched and empty.  Her little heart was crushed and she thought maybe she wasn’t good enough, or maybe her friends had lied to her. 

After Christmas, Mom took a ride with her dad (my “Pop” that I adored), and he asked her if she liked what she had gotten for Christmas.  It was then then she told him about the sock.  As they talked, eventually the subject of the Easter Bunny came up and Mom asked Pop, “Do you think the bunny will leave me candy if I have a basket?”  Pop replied, “I think he will.”  That Easter season, Mom put out her basket, and when she woke up the next morning, her basket contained a package of Heath bars.  Her heart knew, even at that young age, that Pop made sure she wasn’t disappointed again.

img_4890-edit.jpgFast forward to Christmas in our family this year.  My mom is now living with my husband and I, and my Dad is living in a memory care facility.  This is our first Christmas on this new journey, and it has brought many logistical and emotional changes.  I’ve woken up at my parents’ house for Christmas my entire life.  Even as adults, we spent the night with them.   This year, I woke up with my husband in our house, the one we now all share together.  It felt strange not packing up on Christmas Eve to go to my parents’ house for the night.  I knew my Christmas morning would feel different too.  Mom, for the past 30 years or so, woke us all up at 5:00 am by loudly playing The Christmas Song by Nat King Cole.  It’s impossible for me to hear the opening of that song without memories of those mornings flooding my mind.  Our traditions have now been changed not by choice, but by our circumstances.

Traditions, no matter how strong, are always vulnerable to life circumstances or personalities of those who’ve been a part of them.  Some things in life can’t be exactly the same, but they can still be beautiful.  It all depends on whether or not we are willing to open our hearts to new experiences or are able to let go of past ones we wish we could keep forever.  Believe it or not, we have the ability to adjust and adapt in ways we never thought possible. As a matter of fact, some of our greatest revelations are the things we see when we are forced into searching for new ways of doing things.  It is easy to get comfortable and go on auto-pilot when it comes to certain aspects of life.  Familiarity can bring great comfort, but it can also cause you to not even consider what else might be just as (or even more) amazing.

mom blue sockSo, this year, in the midst of the glaring changes to the early part of my Christmas morning, I decided to do something different. I thought about my 5-year old mother and took a light blue sock, filled it with a little toy, a few pieces of candy, and yes, a Heath bar.  I taped it very quietly to the door of my mom’s room and started playing The Christmas Song on my phone that I had laid against her doorway.  As I stood hiding in the morning darkness, listening for the sound of Mom taking that sock off the door, I couldn’t help but think about how there are always opportunities for creating beautiful moments, no matter if they’ve been going on for generations, or whether it’s the very first time it’s happened.  I peeked around the corner of my mom’s room and said, “Merry Christmas.”  There sat my mom on the edge of her bed, laughing and crying at the same time.  So, we sat on the bed together in the faint glow of daybreak, reminiscing about her childhood, “Pop,” our family, and how anything can be redeemed, even if it takes 70 years.  It was my greatest gift this year.

Christmas Day may be behind us, but the gifts that remain are those experiences we shared with family and friends, or even others along the way.  It is the opening of our hearts, listening to each other and loving each other through the difficult times that reminds us we are not alone.  In life, as with Christmas, we need to look for the beauty outside our traditions as well as within them.  Sometimes it is through the changes we didn’t expect in life that we find the changes that make life more beautiful.

Live with your heart open, and when you get the chance along the way, always take time to fill someone else’s little blue sock.

Blessings!

Focus On What You Already Have

Christmas is upon us, and here I am sitting on the floor, late at night, with only the glow of the Christmas tree lights and the screen of my laptop illuminating the room.  It is quiet in my home, yet somehow music keeps rolling through my head.  It isn’t a song of the season, but rather the melodic cadence of a lifetime.  Maybe it’s the glow of the trees, or the silence around me, but moments like this have a way of pulling my gaze away from the noise and pace of everyday life and bringing my focus back to what really matters.

shutterstock_344854976As we continue through a season that is supposed to be filled with joy and love, I look around and see stress and frustration on the faces of people around me.  Drivers are out of control with anger; shoppers are pushing and shoving each other; some people are going into debt trying to meet their (or others’) expectations of gift-giving.  There are also some who are living with great losses and challenges that cause all the standard holiday activities to simply disappear into the background.  In a season that is so often labeled as “magical,” it becomes easy to feel everything but a sense of wonder.   Busyness and activity has a way of doing that before we even realize it.

I had a hard time this year thinking of things to put on my wish list for Christmas.  I honestly couldn’t think of a single thing for which I had a great desire.  It’s not that I have everything I want materially; it’s just that I found myself incredibly content for the first time in a long time.  Somehow in the midst of my incredibly difficult and distressing year filled with loss and change, I realized what I valued had shifted.  It was only when I sat staring at an empty Christmas list that I even recognized it.

It’s so easy to spend our lives focusing on what we don’t have or what we’ve lost.  This year my husband’s parents passed away just five days apart, and my own dad’s dementia escalated to the point where he had to move into a memory care community.  It was devastating for us all, and my mom had to sell their house to ensure dad could stay in his new community as long as possible, as most memory care facilities aren’t covered by insurance (don’t get me started on that).  Mom moved in with me and my husband, and we’ve been adjusting to our new rhythm as best we can.   Loss after loss, grief after grief with no end in sight.  Have you just ever had that kind of year?  If so, then you understand how quickly our perspective changes. All we see is loss, because loss is all that is visible to us.  Everywhere we look there is more grief and pain, more difficult circumstances, and more that is slipping (or has slipped) between our fingers.  It is a natural reaction, but it doesn’t remove the negative effect it can have on our lives.

shutterstock_711300070Dementia has a way of turning everything upside down.  One of the things I love about Teepa Snow, and her organization (www.teepasnow.com ), is that she continually stresses the importance of looking at what someone still has, instead of what they’ve lost.  Build and foster your relationship based on things they are still able to do instead of what you wish they could still do.  When you focus on the abilities someone still possesses, it frees you from the stress that comes from your skewed expectations.  You can expect all day long that your loved one with dementia still has the abilities they’ve always had, but you will just be frustrated and your relationship with that person will suffer.  It’s about living in the moment, taking them where they are and creating beautiful experiences for you both.  I can’t help but think how that concept applies in so many other ways in life.  When we try to build or foster relationships while continually focusing on what the other person has lost or is lacking, we are setting ourselves up for frustration and disappointment.  We will never be satisfied, because we will always be seeing the holes instead of the substance.  We keep trying to work with what isn’t there instead of what is.  What a frustrating endeavor, and even more so when the relationship we are struggling with is the one with ourselves.  It is impossible to build or maintain that internal relationship when we see nothing but what we’ve lost or can’t do anymore.   We can’t build a relationship with ourselves with that perspective, because it will always be skewed and will never be fulfilling.  From a spiritual standpoint, it becomes so easy to start blaming God when things haven’t gone right in our world, or at least what we think is “right,” and then our relationship with Him suffers also.  It’s a slippery slope for sure.

So many people talk about the art of letting go, and there is definitely something incredible about releasing things that hold you back.  But what about the art of holding on?  We spend a lot of time trying to identify our obstacles instead of our strengths.  We focus on what we need to purge from our lives instead of what we already have that needs to be fostered.  I remember a comedian once said about the Bible, “Everyone thinks the Bible is a book of don’ts, but it’s really a book of do-s.  And if we’d spend our time doing the do-s, we wouldn’t have time to do the don’ts.”  I heard that over 30 years ago, and it still sticks with me today just as strongly, because it also applies to how we look at ourselves and others.  If we would spend our time fostering (or appreciating) what we already have, it doesn’t leave much time or energy to focus on what we are lacking in skills, abilities, or even material possessions.  Ask yourself these questions: What do I have to work with? Do I have a special ability or skill?  Am I good at something?  What are those things?  If you ask people to name something they are good at, many (if not most) of them will say they don’t know.  Why?  Because we don’t stop to look at what we have; we look at what we don’t.  We see what we wish we were, wish we had, or wish we could do.  I’m not saying that we shouldn’t strive to be better people, become more skilled, get an education or go after something new.  And I’m certainly not saying you can’t change.  This year has been full of huge changes for me internally, and believe me, it is always possible to change.  It’s possible to be freed from things that chained you in the past, but you also need to focus on what you already possess.  Search your heart deeply for a moment, you know what they are.  They are those things you have forgotten as the cares of this world continually try to distract you from seeing your gifts.

Image-1Dealing with someone who has dementia has brought so many lessons for dealing with life in general.  When someone has dementia, you have to meet them where they are in order to develop and maintain a relationship with them.  My dad isn’t who he used to be, and yet he is still exactly who he always was.  I just have to find those things that he can still do and live in that place with him.  This relationship is not exactly as I wished or hoped it would be at this stage in both our lives, but it can still be something amazing.  Embracing, celebrating and being thankful for all he can still do, allows me to be open to riding this roller coaster with him instead of watching him ride alone.  It allows me to live life with him now, in this moment, instead of continually seeing nothing but what has faded into the fabric of our journey.  If we want to fully live, we must live in the NOW.

Work with what you have.  Meet people where they are.  Meet YOURSELF where you are.  There are so many other abilities you may have, but those are above and beyond the fact you have been gifted with life itself.  Even the ability to breathe and communicate are gifts.  Trust me, you can always do something and then work from there.  If you will start seeing and nurturing what you already have, you’ll be amazed at what else will suddenly appear.  When you are willing to meet a dementia patient where they are, and work with what they have, it’s AMAZING how that tightly closed shell opens up to reveal the pearls within.  I’ve seen it with my own eyes.  If we could just do that with ourselves, what greatness might we unlock?  What goals might we achieve?  What dreams might come true if we will just stop jumping ahead (or backwards) and look at what we’ve lost and simply develop what we still have?

shutterstock_341963009So as we celebrate this Christmas that is upon us, let us first remember the greatest gift God gave us by coming to earth to sacrifice Himself so we can have eternal life.  But let us also remember He didn’t have much from a material standpoint, but He always worked with what He had.  When He called others to join Him, He worked with what they had and compelled them to do the same.  Let us celebrate not just the life of Christ, but the life He wants for each of us.  He’s gifted every single one of us with abilities, even when we feel we don’t have anything on which we can build.  Stop for a moment.  Look within and stop focusing on what you’ve lost or wish you had.  Look deeply and start recognizing all you still have, every single thing you have or are able to do is a gift.  No matter your circumstances or what you might see as your deficiencies, you have way more “gifts” than you can imagine.

To quote the Grinch, “Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

Merry Christmas and may you all be blessed with moments in which to live a lifetime!

Disappointed By God?

What a week! How many times have you reached the end of a weekend and though that to yourself?  This past week really had me up, down and sideways, which always makes me step back and look at things differently.

shutterstock_1196187574I’ve thought a lot this week about hoping and wishing for things.  There was a situation in my personal life that looked like it was going to work out better than we had expected, but then it just didn’t pan out the way we had hoped or wished.  It seems to be the way of life for us, and you’d think we would learn to not expect anything at all.  After all, it would be easier to not hope for anything and be pleasantly surprised, than it would be to think something is going to work out and have it fall through.  Does this sound like days, weeks, or even years you have experienced in your own life?  When I consider the possibility of abandoning hope or expectations that things will work out, it flies in the face of what I have believed.  I’ve always believed God is working everything out for my ultimate good, but what happens when you feel let down over and over until you stop asking for things?

There are a lot of televangelists who tell us we can ask for anything from our Heavenly Father, and I agree that’s true.  We have every right and privilege to ask, but we must remember that sometimes the answer is wait, and sometimes the answer is no.  Just because we ask for it, doesn’t mean it is best for us.  Sometimes what is best for us is something totally opposite of what we ask.  In theory, and as people of faith, we know this to be true but it can be so incredibly defeating and discouraging when it happens over and over.  It is certainly easy for me to start looking at things differently and question why I even ask in the first place.  I start becoming a spiritual “realist” and soon I’m not asking for anything anymore because I’d rather not be disappointed…again.

shutterstock_137512043When my situation came up this past week, it looked like God was doing something above and beyond for us, but then it didn’t happen.  Do you know what that made me think?  I started thinking “here we go again; God must be disappointed in us to dangle this out there and then yank it away.”  I was totally disappointed in God and it temporarily undermined my trust in Him.  Yep, my so‑called faith took a tumble into the abyss for a little while.  But why?  Because my perspective was out of whack on two points:

  1. Our initial problem had actually been resolved far better than we thought possible, and I was thrilled, but then came the possibility for even greater things. When those things didn’t happen, I developed “spiritual amnesia!”  I no longer felt the same gratitude and excitement when my initial prayers were answered. Once a possibility for more existed, it shifted my mindset into hoping and wishing for what I believed was greater or better.
  2. The possibility of greater things was something I attributed to my impression that God was going above and beyond, instead of realizing the enemy could be using this extra aspect to distract me from being grateful for already answered prayers. And it worked.

Once I began thinking negative thoughts about who God is and who I am as His child, everything started to tumble down the rabbit hole right behind it.  I didn’t stop with being disappointed over the present circumstance, but rather continued ruminating on every disappointing circumstance in my life – now or in the past.  I became overwhelmed and depressed.  I told myself I was going to become ambivalent in my prayers and requests to God.  You can imagine the thought process: “If I just ask for things but then don’t expect anything in the answer, I won’t be disappointed.”  I started thinking maybe that’s how God actually wants me to view things – unexpectant and ambivalent.  I have to admit, it was simply another depressing thought, because I couldn’t see past the darkness in which I was tumbling.   The truth is “unexpectant and ambivalent” are the opposite of “trust and certainty,” but in my darkness I could not tell the difference.

shutterstock_401236261Gratitude does not come easy in the storms of life.  When we start jumping to conclusions about what God is or isn’t doing in any given situation, instead of leaving things in His hands and trusting Him to do what is best for us, we often end up disappointed.  The majority of our issues, however, come from thinking that the “best” means the most lucrative or easiest.  Our definition of “good” and “bad” are based on what we can see with our own eyes, or ideas, but God has the vision and perspective of eternity and knows every aspect of our situations.   My uncle used to say, “We don’t really want to trust God to take care of us because what if He doesn’t take care of us like we want to be taken care of?”  I think that is more accurate than most of us would like to admit.  God doesn’t want us to get so conditioned by life that we lose our passion, joy and peace.  He doesn’t want us to ask Him for things and not care what the answer is.  He wants us to be content in the outcome of our requests as a result of understanding who He is and how much He loves us, not because we simply stopped expecting anything from Him.

Look, God knows we are human and that we are going to experience disappointment, hurt, betrayal and many other emotions.  He also knows it is our tendency to let it overwhelm us.  The shortest verse in the Bible is John 11:35 and it simply says, “Jesus wept.”  Lazarus had died and when Jesus got to the tomb and saw his sisters and other friends weeping, it moved Him to the point of tears as well.  Jesus knew He was going to raise Lazarus from the dead and yet He still wept.   He also understood that death here is temporary.  He knew, better than anyone, that life continues for His children in Heaven, and yet He still cried.  Why?  Because knowing the outcome of the story doesn’t mean you don’t cry at the sad parts.

shutterstock_563555992 As people of faith, we know that eventually everything works out for our good, but that doesn’t mean we won’t have to deal with tears, discouragement, anger or depression along the way.  What matters is how we keep walking in spite of it.  It doesn’t mean we won’t have times where we are so tired or discouraged that we curl up into a ball to try and catch our breath; what matters is what we do with that breath when it returns.  Will we use it to perpetuate the darkness around or within us, or will we lift our voice like Paul and Silas in prison and praise the One who loves us and has promised to take care of us?

For me, I don’t want to be blinded to all the good God is doing (or allowing) in my life because of my inability to let go of what I think is “best” for me or my loved ones.  I’m not saying it will be an easy thing to do or a perspective that will be easy to maintain.  I’m just saying, there is no other way to truly experience the peace that passes all understanding and to live the abundant life He offers us.  It’s time to change our definition of what “abundance” truly means.

Blessings!