I realize we are quickly approaching Good Friday and Easter Sunday, but this year I’ve been unable to stop thinking about Palm Sunday. Believe me, I love the reminder of the resurrection and what Jesus did so that I can be saved, but I’ve not paid a whole lot of attention to Palm Sunday until this year. Maybe it’s because I’m in a strange season of life, trying to determine where or what God is tugging me toward, or maybe it’s because I just needed to see something to shift my perspective a little bit.
Less than a week before Jesus was betrayed, brutally beaten and crucified, He had come into Jerusalem to a grand reception! It isn’t called the “Triumphal Entry” for nothing! He was riding on a borrowed donkey’s colt, and the multitudes came out to greet Him. They laid their cloaks before Him on the road and waived palm branches before Him, shouting, “Hosanna! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord” as He rode to the temple. Just think of that sight! Crowds hailing Him as King and publicly acknowledging Him as Messiah. So what in the world happened that caused them to turn on Him so quickly and strongly? How do you go from one extreme to the other in a matter of a few days? The answer really lies in one word: Expectations.
Expectations are interesting things. The dictionary defines “expectation” as a strong belief something will happen or to be the case. Our expectations in life depend on the information we have been given and the way in which we interpret that information. For example, I expect that my husband is going to do the yard work because he said he would do it. I believe he will do it, but I also have my expectations of when it will happen and what it will include. When he does finally go out to do the yard work, he decides not to weed the flowerbeds or sweep off the sidewalk, and I get upset. Why? Because he didn’t do things the way I believed they would be done. 
There may be a good reason why he did things differently, but all I see is my unmet expectations. In my original conversation, all he said was that he was going to take care of the yard. He did not reveal other details of what he planned to do, and I created additional expectations based on the way I would do things. My expectation that the yard work would be done rests on believing what he told me. My expectation of HOW it would be done rests in everything else I assumed from his statement. Our expectations are colored by our past experiences, and they deeply affect our emotions. When we expect something bad to happen and it doesn’t, we get excited and happy. When we expect something good to happen and it doesn’t, we become upset, sad, depressed or even angry. We’ve all experienced the reality of that roller coaster when we interpreted something differently, and suddenly our world is turned upside-down because something unexpected took place.
So back to Palm Sunday, it was a day filled with people who definitely had expectations! Some lived in Jerusalem and some were traveling there for the Passover celebration. They had read the prophesies of old and knew that God was coming to deliver them. They were being oppressed by Roman rule, so when Jesus, their “King,” showed up, they were excited. Deliverance was on the way! They expected Him to ride in and destroy their enemies, deliver them and set up HIS kingdom. They expected to see fire and fight in Him. They expected a political leader. They thought their day had finally come, so they exclaimed His praises as He rode through town. This was a GREAT day for them, but then things started to change quickly. They listened to things He was saying and when His message didn’t fit their expectations, they turned on Him. He said His Kingdom wasn’t of this world (John 18:36). He didn’t argue or even defend Himself when He faced His accusers (Matt 27:12-14). He didn’t answer the charges or even respond to them. By all standards, He appeared weak. He certainly did NOT look like a King about to take over! As a result, it must have confirmed (in the minds of many) that He was not the Messiah, and if He wasn’t the Messiah, then He was definitely a blasphemer as charged. So in a matter of days, the shouts of the crowd went from “Hosanna” to “Crucify!” When given a choice of who to release, they chose to put a convicted thief and murderer back into their community rather than someone who had only done good to others. They were THAT convinced it was impossible He was who He claimed to be, because a King would not come as He came. A King would not just lie down to be slaughtered.
The crowds that shouted Hosanna on Palm Sunday found themselves with serious unmet expectations. The Messiah they longed for and believed in did not show up like they expected Him to, but He did show up, and He did deliver them, and also all of us. They just couldn’t accept God had a plan far greater than their temporary political situation. It was hard to understand after years, or generations, of expecting something different that this could actually be their Messiah, but God was at work on His master plan to change everything for humankind. He was working things out for their good, even when they couldn’t see it or refused to see it.
How many times in our lives have we lived out our own personal “Holy Week?” I have been in difficult situations where I was depending on the many promises of God. I believe He knows and cares about what I’m going through, has the power to deliver me, and is working things out for my good. I have shouted “Hosanna” in my expectations and perceptions of what He has said, but then He starts working things out differently than what I expected. He starts doing or allowing things that I just don’t understand. If we aren’t careful, we watch what’s happening and start to think that maybe He isn’t who we thought He was. We look around and start getting angry that He isn’t doing more “smiting” of our enemies or my circumstances and is instead leaving you or me alone to fight for ourselves. It doesn’t take long for us to think on these things before we end up angry because it seems He doesn’t care enough to take care of us. In our own way, we go from shouting “Hosanna,” to shouting, “Crucify!” We start letting our doubts, or even anger, that arises from unmet expectations to drive our perspective, and we can end up choosing to set free the worst of ourselves rather than to trust God knows what He is doing.
Life is hard. We were never promised that it would be easy. As a matter of fact, we are told repeatedly in the Bible that we will have trials and struggles, but God is always working for our good. It’s just so incredibly hard to accept that as truth when our reality feels so much like the opposite. Yes, God has the ability to come riding into our circumstances, proclaim Himself as King and destroy whatever or whoever is oppressing us, but we can’t see the big picture. Sometimes He is working on a much grander and better plan for our deliverance than we can see. Just because it doesn’t make sense to us, doesn’t mean God isn’t who He says He is, or doing what He said He would do.
There are many beautiful pictures in the Easter story – pictures of grace and mercy, of sacrifice and redemption – but this year my prayer is that we remember the crowds. I pray we remember the way their unmet expectations of HOW God was going to deliver them caused such a drastic change in a matter of days. 
Unmet expectations can cause us to doubt what we know to be true. When we hold so tightly to our version of what our deliverance should look like, or how it should come, we end up spending our lives looking for the next best solution. We waste our energy trying to resolve it ourselves and end up sacrificing our peace and joy in the process. Sometimes our deliverance comes through waiting. Sometimes it comes through struggles. And sometimes we are yelling “Crucify” at the very One who is delivering us – all because He isn’t doing it as we expected.
So look up, my friends, and I will look with you. I will look to the cross and see not only love and redemption, but also a reminder that God is working a master plan for my good. And when it seems like God is doing nothing, He is doing something exceedingly, abundantly above all I could ask or think. I just need to stop shouting my plans at Him and trust in the fulfillment of His own.
Blessings and a very happy Easter to you all!
Mother’s Day is once again upon us, and with it comes all sorts of emotions for all kinds of people. Some are celebrating their wonderful moms, while others are mourning the loss of their mother, and still others may be cringing at the memory of a mother who wasn’t there for them. Some women are relishing their own role as a mother, while others are just trying to make it through a day that reminds them only of the void that comes with never having been able to have children of their own, or worse, having lost one to miscarriages or other tragedies. My point is this day can be beautiful and wonderful, or it could bring heartache and pain, and no matter where you or I fall on that spectrum, we all have to walk through this day somehow.
This year, in spite of all of life’s challenges and the complications that can come with this day for so many women (and men), there is something different on my heart and mind. This year, I am thanking God not only for my own godly mother who raised me in deep love and faith, or the children in my life that I’ve had the opportunity to influence in one way or another, but I am also thanking God for the three children my husband and I sponsor through Compassion International. It’s been a number of years now, and although it took a while to become comfortable with our communications back and forth, we have settled into beautiful relationships with three children who live across the world from us. We have watched them grow, and have been blessed to be able to support, encourage and be connected to these kids and their families, and I am unspeakably grateful as I reflect on it today.
When you consider what it truly means to “mother” another human being, you are able to step back and see a broader group of women than you might have before. All the characteristics, traits and actions that make a woman a true mother, are the same ones that make us all mothers to the world around us. I’m not discounting mothers in any way, in fact, I am doing the exact opposite. I am elevating the aspects of mothers that we all celebrate on this day each year. We celebrate the love and care. We celebrate the sacrifices. We celebrate these amazing women who took their jobs seriously and refused to give up even when their children may have disappointed them or caused them pain. These are the things we celebrate, and as people of faith, THIS is how we are supposed to love the world!
So on this Mother’s Day, by all means, honor your mother and the other women in your lives that are worthy of that honor. Thank God for all the women who mothered you throughout the course of your life. Honor them by doing the same for others around you. Don’t reserve your nurturing just for your children, but also for those children without mothers, and for adults who are wounded and hurting. Over and over again, Jesus tells us to love one another. He tells us that everyone is our neighbor (Luke 10:25-37). He tells us to go the extra mile when we don’t have to do so (Matt 5:41). He tells us to love our enemies (Matt 4:43-48). Jesus made it perfectly clear that we are commanded to love! He told us,“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”(John 13:34-35)
Happy New Year’s Eve! Every new year brings with it the hope for positive changes and experiences ahead for us. We reflect on the past year and consider what didn’t go as we expected or how we didn’t do the things we originally planned. Maybe your year has been filled with more successes and joy than you even imagined, or maybe it was filled with changes that brought loss and pain to your heart. Either way, we still seem to have this innate sense of reflection when a new year is about to begin, but why? There is something so refreshing about newness in life. It is why so many people love the season of spring so much, there is new life blooming all around us. New life is exciting and reminds us that even when the ground is dark and cold, there is life beneath it just waiting to explode into view. I guess it’s much the same sensation as we approach a new year. Winter is raging, but it feels as though a newness of life is growing, waiting to burst forth into view. New life represents a replenishment of hope. It’s a burst of energy. It’s a new focus or new commitment. But mostly it is a new perspective or a new vision of what lies ahead.
Sometimes God replenishes us and refreshes us through the difficult processes of letting go. I recently took several months off from my official responsibilities at church, and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I prayed about it over and over, as it is not my nature to take a break of any kind. I always scheduled vacations and business trips around being able to be in my place of service, so to know God was leading me to take a break from what I’ve felt I needed to do really rattled my brain! The key phrase to that last sentence is “what I’ve felt.” When we insist on operating under what we feel instead of what God is asking of us, it creates the most challenging disjoints. For one thing, we are called to walk by faith, not by sight (2 Cor. 5:7). If God wants us to walk by faith and not in what we can see with our own eyes, I’m certain He doesn’t want us walking by what we feel either! Our emotions can wreak havoc on the direction God is leading us in any situation, because we want to feel like what we are doing makes sense. I’ll speak for myself here: I don’t want to feel like what I’m doing is stupid or that others may see me as making decisions that appear to be rash or thoughtless. I don’t want to appear irresponsible or flaky. I don’t want to follow God’s leading only to have others judging me to be things I am not. Since it is the holiday season, it reminds me of how Joseph probably had many of those same thoughts when he realized that none of his friends or family were going to believe (or be privy to) all the details of his pregnant fiancee or why he didn’t “put her away.” He knew how people would look at him or talk about him, but he walked the path God laid out for him and let God take care of the details.
We really need to remember that each new year doesn’t just begin on January 1st. Every breath is the beginning of a new year. Every heartbeat is the beginning of what our lives will become. Living with that kind of refreshed perspective brings hope for a better future, but whether or not anything changes depends on how we view ourselves in comparison to our Savior. Do I really think I’m smarter than Him or have more resources? Do I really think I’m more enlightened or understand more? He knows and sees what I am unable to, and He has already planned ways around or through the maze of my life. I need to remember He is working things for my ultimate good. I need to stop trying to cut openings in the dead ends just because I think I’m smart enough to see a better way and strong enough to create it. I need to remember that I am replenished when I step back, breathe, and follow wherever He leads no matter how it appears to others. I need to remember the depth of my Father’s love for me, and that everything He does or allows is is bathed in that pure and perfect love.
If you are like me, we need to let go of what we think is best for us, or the worry and fear that comes with what others might think of us, and trust what our Father says to us in His word: “For I know the plans I have for you,”says the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11) His plans for our successes far exceed our ability to create our own, and His replenishment trumps our “resolutions.” Every. Single. Time.
Gifts. It’s always a big topic of every holiday season. We might be busy trying to buy things from a “wish list” of someone we know, or maybe we are thinking about what we ourselves might receive for Christmas. But here’s a question: Have you ever received an amazing gift you didn’t even know you wanted or would have ever imagined? Unexpected gifts often bring unexpected blessings, and yet when it comes to circumstances in our lives, we don’t seem to have that reaction.
We want things to be good, prosperous, and somewhat easy, but we certainly don’t want and wouldn’t choose for ourselves things like pain, grief, loss, betrayal or being dismissed. When we endure those things, it’s hard to see them as gifts. Over the past year, I have been given many of those so-called “gifts,” and if I am being honest, I wasn’t too happy about it. I have complained, been discouraged and even distraught at times. I’ve definitely had moments of feeling like God is a grinch and that He just seems to want to take away everything good from us. That being said, I have also learned that sometimes when we lose things or go through difficult times, it really does start to change our perspective. It enables us, if we allow God to work, to see things differently. It allows us to grow, and that is a gift. I would dare say it is one of His greatest gifts to us – presenting us with situations that challenge us and force us to re-examine our lives, faith and service to Him and to others in whatever place we find ourselves. Sometimes He allows things to happen that force us to reach out to others, and in doing so we often find incredible people and incredible perspective. When we open ourselves up to what God is doing rather than trying to explain it, we find love, compassion, care, and genuine concern. We find His word speaking to us through channels we wouldn’t have previously considered, and all of these things we find coming from a source that we don’t expect. When we stand back and truly see the goodness of God and His mercy in allowing difficult circumstances into our lives, we can become thankful for it. It’s truly difficult for us to embrace our challenges, disappointments and discouragements or the people or things that cause them, but they truly are for our good.
We have a good Father who loves us and wants the best for us always. He has an amazing plan for our lives that includes our places of service. He knows what’s coming, and while we are freaking out trying to see ahead, He is standing there patting us on the shoulder whispering, “I am the one who goes before you. I’ll be with you, so don’t be afraid or dismayed. I’ll never leave you or forsake you.” (Deut. 31:8) He knows that no matter what we are going through, that there is a PLAN! Let that sink in for a moment. I’ve been talking about “unexpected gifts” but they are only unexpected to us and not to God! He is not only aware of what is happening, but He is working through all of it to bring us to the most amazing places in this life. Remember, we see the messy threads underneath the tapestry that look jumbled and ugly, but when you flip it over, you see the beautiful image and artwork that God saw (and designed) all along.
So as we approach this season of celebration, I am thankful for unexpected gifts and unexpected paths. I am grateful that God doesn’t just know exactly what we need, but also knows the desires of our hearts that we ourselves haven’t even realized! I am thankful that He continually works in our lives so that we can change our perspective and come into alignment with HIS heart. When we trust that He is good and is always working ALL things for our good, then we begin to desire what He desires. We want what He wants instead of depending on our understanding of what is “good.” Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” He can do that because when we delight in HIS will and HIS plans, then it’s easy to give us the desires of our hearts because they are the same as His.
It’s funny how God always gives us the answers we need instead of the ones we want. Right now, there are many things in my world that are causing me great distress, and I have earnestly prayed for clarity in all of them, waiting for God to answer me. I have been coming to Him with the right heart, but I didn’t know I was asking the wrong questions. Instead of providing clarity on all my situations, He revealed to me what I needed in order to hear His answers, and in doing so, He answered the one question I wasn’t even asking: “How do I find clarity on HOW to get clarity?”
In my situation(s), I keep praying for clarity on what I’m supposed to do. What is the solution? Am I supposed to stand firm? Am I supposed to walk away? I just want to know which way to turn, because I don’t have that direction yet. I don’t want to do something I’m not being called to do, so it stands to reason that my heart would be searching for answers. But what do we do when those answers don’t seem to be coming?
When we are truly seeking the right direction in our lives or circumstances, we go through a process of discovery. We ask and ponder and sometimes even drive ourselves crazy trying to wrap our hands or heads around a plan that will work. Our hearts can be in the right place, but the fog hanging over it can make it confusing, so we pray and consider all aspects of our situation. For me, that consideration can actually bring up more and more feelings of discouragement and frustration. Those feelings can then lead me to a place where I am ready to change direction or make decisions based on how I feel. When we arrive at these places, we need to ask ourselves, “Do I feel called somewhere else or to something else, or am I just frustrated, bored, disappointed, etc.?” If our response to that question is that we are frustrated and such, then it’s time to step back. Being frustrated and disappointed is very different from being “called.” I know because I’m experiencing it in my own life, and yet God has been quietly whispering to me, answering the question I wasn’t even asking:
I know we often look at the word “radical” as somewhat of a bad word, especially in churches, but how did Jesus command us to love each other? And how are we commanded to treat each other? We know the answers to those questions. They are simple answers, and yet so difficult to put into practice because we are human. We get tired of loving, forgiving and serving others when we get nothing in return from them. Sometimes in the middle of my discouragement, I am reminded of how often Jesus must have felt the same way. When I shared this with my husband recently, his response was, “I’m not Jesus. I’m not divine.” Although I completely understand the sentiment, it isn’t an accurate one. We ARE divine. My mind and body may not be divine, but my spirit is! As believers, we have the Holy Spirit living within us. Our spirit is HIS spirit, so we truly are divine in that one area of our own trinity (body, mind, spirit). That means we CAN love and forgive radically, but we choose not to because it’s so hard to overcome our human nature. It’s a battle, and we are always going to fail here and there because we aren’t perfect! I often feel like the apostle Paul – I don’t do what I want to do and I can stop doing what I don’t want to do!
Our actions can certainly be evidence of our commitment or the commitment of others, whether it’s to our family, church, jobs, or anything else. Talk is really cheap, but we need to remember that actions can also be deceiving. We’ve all had times where we remained committed to our responsibilities long after our heart was no longer in it. In these cases, it gives the impression we are committed, but the truth is we are just going through the motions. It’s no different than those who constantly talk about being committed but won’t ever sacrifice or, as the saying goes, “put their money where their mouths are.” Our service to God in EVERY area of life is between us and God first. Only we can determine where God is calling us or in what manner He is asking us to serve. Our responsibility is to Him first, and if we want to have clear direction, we must keep our priorities in order. Like most of us, I need to humble my attitude more. It’s easy to feel pious or like a martyr when we feel like we are the only ones doing all the work. And guess what? Sometimes you ARE doing all the work. When that’s the case, it’s easy to fall prey to that mindset, but then we are letting our emotions take over. God tells us that whatever we do should be done in love. Period. (1 Cor 16:14) That also means if I am serving, it shouldn’t be out of obligation, and it shouldn’t matter what others are or are not doing. What matters is whether or not I am doing things from a heart of true love, forgiveness and service.
We naturally want things to be fair in life. What we don’t consider is who determines what is “fair” and what is not? God has commanded us to drop our own attitudes, even if they seem warranted and realistic. It’s ok to feel angry, disappointed, discouraged and frustrated, but God tells us to let it go! We know it’s true, but I sometimes act like a whining child and think, “Why do I always have to drop my attitude, but they never have to drop theirs?” Have you ever felt that way? Well, God’s response to that question is, “You drop it because you are mature enough to know better.” Ugh – if that doesn’t hit you in the heart, I don’t know what will. Sometimes the reason God asks so much of us is because we know better. He asks more of us because we are more spiritually mature. After all, to whom much is given, much is required. Go read about the concept of the “weaker brother” in Romans chapter 14, and consider that for a moment. Sometimes being right isn’t always the right thing for us to do. It really does all come back to love, but instead we sit and complain about fairness. I have news for you, until you are hanging on a cross with people spitting on you and torturing you to death, you don’t have any right to complain that it’s not fair that you have to treat people with love and kindness in spite of how they treat you in return.
When we are faced with situations we don’t understand or are wondering why God doesn’t seem to be listening, we need to step back. When we are trying to discern whether or not God is pulling and drawing us toward something else, we need to make sure we aren’t squinting through a fog trying to guess what or where it is. When we know there are things God wants us to do, but refuse to do them because we don’t like them or think they are fair, then we are turning up the noise that prevents us from hearing what He’s trying to tell us. If we will simply start loving radically and forgiving radically, regardless of what anyone else does, we can start to clear the fog. When that happens, I can have far more confidence in the answers to my questions. It’s definitely not easy to do, but it is the truth, nonetheless. Clarity in the details can only come after we have clarity on the bigger picture.
We may not be perfect, but if we will become as radical in our love and forgiveness for others as He was, then the fog will begin to clear. As it says in Proverbs 3:6, “In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.” We can’t cherry-pick the areas in which we follow and then expect Him to make the path clear to us. He just won’t do it.
The Cadence of My Soul 